a little q & a

So...it's been a while since our last update.  Life has been pretty hectic, our days have been full, we're still getting used to writing blog posts together...AND, we've been up to our armpits in homework for the home study.  Lately, much of our "free" time is chewed up reading adoption-related books and working through online studies.  We are getting really close to having our homework done - so that's something to be thankful for!

One of the things I (Josh) wanted to do was to interview my wife (Jaclyn) to give all of our friends, our family (and the occasional random person who drops by) a sense of what is happening and what we are learning about at this time.

Q:  It's been a few weeks since the last update, what is the current status regarding the adoption process?

A: Our final home study appointment is tomorrow (Thursday).  We are completing our “homework” for the Michigan Adoption agency (reading books, completing online courses, etc.).  After this process is complete, everything gets sent to our Placing Agency in Indiana.  After they compile the paperwork, we pay our first ½ of the fees and then we wait to be matched with our son. 

Q: What is God speaking to you at this time?A: Patience.  I am at peace with the process and timeline. 

Q: Any concerns right now?A: I am praying for financial peace.  I don’t want our children to think that we are poor but I also want them to learn the difference between need and want.  We have been emphasizing that we are choosing to spend our money in different ways, but it is always difficult to say "no" to our children. 

Q: What are you celebrating?A: Our children are so excited about adopting.  It is wonderful to see them share with their friends that they will have a brother from Lesotho. 

Q: How do you respond when people ask you - "Why not foster care?  There are 4000+ orphans in Michigan, and it's less expensive than international adoption?"
A: We feel called by God to adopt internationally and not domestically through foster care.  It is what it is.  J 

$11.96

$11.96 is a pile of money to an 8- and 5-year old.

$11.96 is what Naomi, Elijah, and their friends brought in yesterday from their lemonade stand.

$11.96 is what they worked hard to earn selling lemonade, brownies, and bracelets.

$11.96 is what they gave away.

$11.96 is what they gave to the adoption fund.

And I have the jar of change to prove it.

God's leading, our response (part two)

The possibility of adoption began for me (Josh) nearly two years ago while Jaclyn was still pregnant with our youngest, Abigail.  Family and friends will recall that while all three pregnancies were physically hard on Jaclyn's body, the third pregnancy was the most difficult of all.

I'm not very good at remembering dates, but when we went for a routine ultrasound, somewhere around week 20, we learned that there was a problem.  The ultrasound showed a large problematic hematoma.  By all appearances, Abigail was healthy and safe, but the doctors could not be certain.  Jaclyn was immediately placed on modified bed rest and was not allowed to return to work until the doctor gave the all clear, and we were subsequently referred to a specialist in Grand Rapids for further consultation.

Jaclyn carried Abigail full term and I remember being exhausted by the time she came along - physically, emotionally, spiritually.  The hematoma...the bed rest...plus the disabling migraine headaches that Jaclyn was prone to took its toll on us, and I remember saying to myself: "That's all I can handle.  I have reached my limit."  After Abigail was born, I recall saying to Jaclyn that we'd have to pray hard and be absolutely certain before getting pregnant again because I wasn't sure I could endure all of that again.

Though I was pretty darn sure we were done having biological children, I was wide open to the possibility of adoption.  As Jaclyn shared earlier (see previous post from her), through a series of events - books we were reading, Sunday sermons, adoptive parents we met, and prayer - we were simultaneously sensing both a push and pull to adopt.  The push came through God's Spirit speaking to our spirits about taking greater risks for Him and the Kingdom.  All the while our heartstrings were being pulled as we learned more about the orphans our friends, Brian and Anita, were caring for in Lesotho, Africa.

Today is a "milestone" kind of day.  Today, Jaclyn and I have our first (of three) homestudy appointment.  For those who don't know, a homestudy is a detailed report made by an adoption agency submitted by an adoption social worker.  The details of the report will be submitted to our adoption agency - Americans for African Adoptions - to help make a final determination if we can, as a family, continue on in the adoption process.

Your prayers are greatly appreciated as we continue on this journey.  Peace.
Josh

God's leading, our response

I (Jaclyn) have grown up in a home that has been supportive of international adoptions.  I have 2 younger sisters that were adopted when I was 14 (Suzanne) and again when I was 20 (Kelly).  When my youngest sister, Kelly, was adopted, I went with my Mom to the Philippines to finalize the paperwork and take her home.  We also have a niece that was adopted from Guatemala 5 years ago.  I was able to visit her in Guatemala with my older sister, Shelly, prior to their adoption being finalized.  Due to the history of my family, I think we both have a real understanding of the process of adoption and the difficulties that can and will occur in a family setting afterwards.  However, we also know how wonderful adoption can be and how blessed the whole family is as a result. 

Several months ago, I had been reading a couple books (Crazy Love and Unshaken) and was overcome with the emotions and feelings that we needed to adopt.   I felt like we really needed to live out our lives the way God intended, including taking care of orphans and widows.  But I didn’t act upon it then as it didn’t seem like it was the right time for our family.  Then just recently, my younger sister, Suzanne, married the love of her life.  My older brother, Greg, officiated at the wedding and spoke about how love in a marriage is a choice, just like the love in adoption.  We choose to love each other through the good times and the bad.  We have had a lot of rough times with Suzanne throughout the last 19 years she has been a part of our family, especially in the last couple years.  But through it all, we still love her as a sister.  This wedding was almost like a positive reinforcement/resolution for us that through it all good can come.

A week after the wedding, Josh and I were sitting outside at another wedding.  We happened to be seated right in front of a couple that is going through an adoption from Haiti currently.  They shared their amazing “God moments” about the process and it was so exciting to see their joy.  You see, I spent 18 months in Port-au-Prince, Haiti as a teacher just before Josh and I were married.  I have a heart for the people of Haiti and instantly felt connected to this couple. 

The next day, on July 3, 2011, we sat in church and listened to our children’s director talk about giving your children purpose in life.  She talked about how if you want your children to grow up serving others that we need to do that as a family together now.  Something in her talk really hit me (Jaclyn) in that we need to adopt now and not wait for the perfect time.

The next week I started looking into international adoptions.  Our previous neighbors and good friends moved with their family of 5 to Lesotho, Africa in December 2010 to work at an orphanage for 5 years.  We have stayed in touch with them through Facebook, their blog, and Skype.  We have since grown to love the people of Lesotho, which is why we chose this country through which to pursue adoption.   

time for renovation

The time has come to do some remodeling around here.  I am taking an extended blogging break in order to come back with a new focus (details to come soon).  A big "thank you" to all my friends and family who have read my posts over the years and I hope the new blog will be an even greater encouragement to you.  Be back soon.