In the book Choosing Civility, Rule #8 is Give and Accept Praise. Just this morning I overheard a conversation between co-laborers in Christ about a mutual aquaintance who pleaded with her father to give her praise when he saw her parenting well instead of continually criticizing her for all the "wrong" things she does. "Please," she pleaded, "just tell me when you see me doing something right!" This woman's plea is our plea for affirmation; for a job well done; for a kind gesture; or a Godly word.
One of my mentor's is really good at giving praise. And what I really appreciate about his praise is that it is frequent and genuine. I really don't think the man can help himself. My wife and I will miss an upcoming congregational vote to purchase a piece of property for the church we are members of, and so I emailed him to let him know that we were going to be gone on that particular Sunday, but we vote "yes" in favor of the property purchase.
Here was his response (I post this not because I'm drawing attention to myself - I'm really not. This is an excellent example of how pastors - or anyone who oversees others - should think of others)...
"Josh – Can’t wait to see you – hope that it is soon – I will be going to Arkansas on a family mission trip next week. Appreciate who you are and what you do in our midst as a church family. You are a deep blessing."
I wrote to him about casting our vote. He responded with a word that lifted me up and set the tone for my day. This is the kind of gift where the only appropriate response is a simple and heartfelt, "Thank you."
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